Teen self: Future great, get there faster. LISP Ethical slut Weights Tighter clothes Oneitis (Stop!) No god More math GEB TRUST YOURSELF
Teen self: get yourself a Scheme and work through all the problems in SICP. SERIOUSLY YOU COULD BE HAVING SO MUCH FUN RIGHT NOW.
Teen self: Future you lives in a house with his girlfriend and her boyfriend. Seriously, it's not even a big deal.
Teen self: Weightlifting is not just for jocks. Like looking at pretty girls? They like looking at hot guys! Getting hotter is Cooperation!
Teen self: it being possible to tell there is a human body under your clothes does not make them rude. Seriously, you are swimming in those.
Teen self: She is halfway down the hallway why are you standing there holding the door WTF you are making her feel so awkward WHYYYYY
#teenself: Your intuitions about math thingies being more fundamental than brain thingies are right on. Future you is fine with this.
Teen self: Just because you've learned all the high school math doesn't mean there's no more. Group theory Category theory GEB KEEP READING
#teenself: yeah, you forget/lose things a lot; you'll be able to function as an adult *anyway*. Things can be replaced.
#teenself But seriously, even if you don't hear any of this, it all turns out pretty awesome. It's ok. *hug*